I Believe In...

True love, soul mates, serendipity and fate

Singing, even when there is no music

Eating cookies for breakfast

The good in everyone

Holding hands

Taking chances

Acting like a kid again

Doing nice things for other people just because

Staying up all night

Driving fast with the windows down and the music blasting

Natural beauty

Walking around barefoot

Eating whipped cream straight from the can

The power of time to heal all wounds

Destiny

Miracles

Sing-a-longs

Best friends

Celebrating the small things

Watching sappy romance movies and crying your eyes out

Endless summers

Doing what you love with passion

Wishing upon stars, and the idea that dreams really can come true

Friends becoming family

Shopping as a form of therapy

Forgiveness

and

True happiness

Candle.

This is going to be a lot harder that I thought...it has turned into more than I expected it would.


"I'd be lying if I told you that losing you was something I could handle."

Mistakes We Knew We Were Making

You know what one of the worst feelings is? Guilt. Unlike other feelings, the guilt you feel is often a result from your own actions and wrong doings. Things that are often in your control, and therefore, your responsibility. The worst part about guilt is that no matter how many times you replay a situation in your head, you cannot change what happened. In hindsight, you realize what should have happened, but there is no way to undo what has already been done. A scene can replay in your head, for days, months or years like a bad dream.

So, my personal remedy for this? Simple. Live with no regrets. We all make mistakes, trust me, I know, but we shouldn't dwell on them. Because, really, what's the point in doing that? At this point, you can't change the situation. But, what you can change is how you act the next time. I am a huge believer in learning from your mistakes.

Guilt is beneficial because it is what keeps us in check. We might think that something we do is right, or acceptable, our feelings tell us that it is not. So, even when our judgment might be skewed, our guilt is there to bring us crashing back to earth.

Make mistakes. It's inevitable. Just take a breath, recollect, learn, move on and become better.

Sunny With a High of Seventy-Five.

The other day it occurred to me that I haven't blogged in awhile. I guess this is just because I haven't had much to say. I tend to write in times of unease, and I just haven't felt recently. Amazing? The answer, Yes.

I'm at a place in my life where I haven't been in a long while. A place where I am content beyond all belief. I am so happy and grateful for everything and everyone in my life right now, and there is no place else I'd rather be. I'm overwhelmed with feelings of...peace, and at times, I just find myself smiling. This feeling probably won't last for long, because it never seems to. But, for now, I just want to enjoy it.





"It's funny how you enjoy your life when your happy to be alive..."

So far in '09

In:

• Peanut M&Ms
• Stressstressstress
• The "Jizz in my pants" video, and related jokes
• Long phone calls with best friends back home
• Chai tea lattes
• New roommates
• The new ADTR cd
• Counting down the days until I get to go home for spring break (exactly two weeks from today!)
  

Out:

• Fresno, CA
• Frat boys (not that they were ever in)
• Public transportation
• Winter
• Rain

Life's Little Book of Instructions

" I like nonsense; it wakens up the brain cells. Fantasy is a necessary ingredient in living, it's a way of looking at life through the wrong end of a telescope and that enables you to laugh at life's realities."
--- Dr. Seuss

It's just a thought...

Maybe he's just not that into you...

Just from the title of this blog, I bet you can guess where my inspiration came from. Needless to say, it's a subject that has gotten me thinking...why are we so concerned about over analyzing everything people do in relationships? I guess as girls, we are conditioned to believe that when a guy says something, there is a lot more to what he is saying than just the words coming out of his mouth. However, the only reason we believe this is because we, as girls, do the complete opposite. That is, we cannot be direct. Sorry, but you have to face the truth. We try to avoid hurting people's feelings, confrontation, whatever, by beating around the bush. We say something, but we mean something else. I'm not saying that I'm not guilty of this too, but what's the point? Guys are direct. What they say is what they mean, simple as that. So, now that we have established that, lets move on...

As I said, boys are direct. If they want to call you, they will. If they want to text you, they will. If they want anything to do with you, they will make it happen. If you are waiting for one of the things said above, but have yet to see any progress, guess what honey...yup, you know what I'm gonna say, he's probably just not that into you. So next time you're at a party and have consumed a bit too much, and you start to get that slushy, mushy feeling in your stomach when you see couples all around you, don't grab your phone and call that potential guy because it will only lead to bad things. Instead think WWPCD, what would Princess Camilla (hint hint: she's the princess of Wales) do. Would she call that guy sobbing about how he is such a jerk and how he should care more about her? Would she check her phone every ten minutes to see if he texted her back? Would she text him AGAIN just because he didn't respond to the first text? Clearly, the answer to all these questions is NO. So, that means you shouldn't do any of these things either, becuase your just as much of a princess as she is...kinda.

Skeptics and True Believers Part II

I was inspired to write part II of this blog after sitting with Tonhu in a place that I frequent quite often, the lounge on the second floor of the Thompson building. We sat there for a long time recapping on this past weekends events and, you guessed it, fate.
As you can probably guess, I really am a believer in the concept. I mean, c'mon, how many times have I already mentioned it in this blog?! I just think it's a fascinating concept, and I am always looking at it from different angles.
Its funny how no matter how strongly we believe in something, one day, someone can just come into our lives and completely break down the complex we hold. I know what I believe, and when something, or someone, seems unattainable, I should just know that the situation is out of my hands. Just stop trying. No matter how many times I say that to other people (Nhu =]), its hard to believe it yourself. Yep, here comes that word again. Fate. Whatever is supposed to happen will. So just open your hands, and let it all fall away. Stop stressing yourself out becuase there is nothing you can do.
Valentine's Day is only a week away. Wanna know my plans? Well, me and Tonhu are going to be doing...nothing. Yep, nothing. In fact, it seems like were going to be the only people left on this whole campus, becuase everyone is going home. I liked what Nhu wrote, she said, "how is it that most of my friends have found... "the one". while i've never ever even had "one". My response to this is that you just have to believe that this is just the bulid-up. On the fourth of July you watch fireworks go off, one by one, some bigger and brighter than the others. But, you always know what will end up happening. The grand finale, the best part. All those other "fireworks" are just fillers until the end. Just know that right now it might seem like your the only one without someone to watch the fireworks with, but that just means that when you finally have them laying in the grass next to you looking up at that beautiful sky, it will be that much better.

Chasing the Night.

Let's turn this up a little bit louder.

There's nothing like an...let's call it "eventful" weekend after a stressful week of midterms.
I really am having the time of my life right now. I don't mean that I don't miss my best friends at home, and the amazing times we shared there, but this is something different. A different experience entirely. I think that the fact that you're not at home anymore makes a huge difference. You don't have to be home at a certain time, and you depend on the friends you have around you to be your substitute family.
Were young. What everyone says is true, this really is the time of your life, so enjoy it. Do something crazy, take a chance, don't be afraid to experience things. Above all, appreciate all the beauty that life has to offer you, because that is something that we ofter forget to do until it is too late.

"These are the days that we will always remember.
Chasing the night to make our days better. "

Life is a never ending learning experience, and I'm sure enjoying the ride.

Skeptics and True Believers.

I've always had my...I guess you could call them "theories" about life, that I have created in my head and firmly believed in. Everyone creates different realities for themselves, and we all look at the world differently. I find it amazing that we can all think something completely different, yet all believe we are right. Part of the beauty of living, or perhaps one of the scariest things about it, is that we may never figure out what it all means.

Fate, destiny, luck, good timing....call it whatever you want, but I believe in it. Some people do not want to believe that we have a predetermined path that we are supposed to follow in our lives, but it is one belief I hold that can get me through almost any tough situation. People think that having this so called "path" means that we as human beings do not have the freedom to choose, and create the lives that we want for ourselves. But, I don't believe that. I think that we do have the ability to live our lives the way we want, but that this want is what we are supposed to choose. The way I describe it seems like I am talking myself in a circle, but it makes sense in my head.

As I was walking through the Tecero dorm area today, I was stepping through the grass, looking at the bulidings. I was wondering which one I would have lived in had I been assigned to live there, as it was my first choice on my housing application. Crazy. What if I did live there? How different would my life be? I wouldn't be friends with the people I am friends with now...I probably wouldn't even know that they existed.

Everything happens for a reason. The people that come into your life are there for a reason. Nothing is random. You learn things from everyone you come into contact with, even if you don't realize iti at the time...or ever. The boy I like just broke up with me. He wasen't the one for you. I didn't get into the school of my dreams. You weren't meant to be there. Take a deep breath, and realize that there is something better out there, and let it go.

Days of the Cold

Six days down and only...9 more weeks to go?! It seems like such a long time, but from what I hear it goes quick. I hope that those rumors are true. I absolutely love school and my so called "home away from home", but actually being home was amazing. For the first time in a long time I completely felt like myself. I was with the people I care about most in this whole world, almost all of which I felt like I grew closer to in those three short weeks. That's a good way to look at it, just multiply Christmas break by 3! It went by so fast, that it makes me think that I will be back home in no time!
A lot of people who live relatively close to school go home almost every weekend. However, I like not being able to do that, it just makes things harder. I need to be away from the things and people I love because when I finally have them back, I being to love them even more. I guess absence really does make the heart grow fonder.
I feel like I am really finding a place here, and it makes me feel great. That feeling ensures me that I am in the right place, and that this is what I'm supposed to be doing, no matter how stressful it can be (and trust me, it is).
So, nine weeks may seem like an impossible 63 days to get through, but its something I'm ready to face head on, and enjoy as much as I possibly can. Let's just hope that I don't turn into an ice cube before March 19th =]